Smithsonian employee arrested for renting out dinosaur fossils for sex

A security guard of the famous Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History was arrested the morning in Washington and accused of leading an unusual sex ring in which customers paid to have sex with dinosaur fossils.

57-year Leonard Johnson was arrested around 4:30 AM this morning by the Metropolitan Police Department (MPD), along with four other men suspected of being customers.

MPD spokesman, Lieutenant James Connelly, says this unique sex ring had been running for at least two years and attracted rich customers from around the world.

“Some customers paid up to $15,000 to have sex with a T-rex or a triceratops fossil. We estimated that the accused has pocketed between $1,5 and $3,5 million over the last two years.”

According to Lt. Connelly, some customers came from as far away as China, Saudi Arabia or Russia to have sex with dinosaur fossils.

“As far as we know, there is no other similar sex ring in the world, and we were able to determine that it attracted customers from at least twenty different countries.”

Part of the museum’s dinosaur exhibit was closed this morning while employees were repairing some minor damage suffered by the fossils during last night’s sexual assaults.

Mr. Johnson faces a total of 87 criminal charges, including 17 charges of extortion, after allegedly blackmailing some of his customers, threatening to reveal their “strange sexual habits” if they refused to pay him.

If found guilty on all charges, he faces a total of 485 years in prison and a fine of more than $4 million.

Mr. Johnson’s lawyer, Mr. Jakob Wolstein, refused to comment and didn’t say if his client intended to plead guilty.

The trial is expected to begin in May and should draw a lot of media attention, considering the unusual nature of the charges.

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