Russian Scientists Discover Cure to Homosexuality

baby-vaccine

Novosibirsk| Dr. Dimitri Yusrokov Slamini of the Russian Institute for Medical Science in Novosibirsk and his team of researchers have discovered what they claim to be a new vaccine which could prevent early symptoms and even cure humans of homosexuality if treated at a young age.

Russian scientists developed the so-called «antidote» based on a 1959 scientific research published under the title “Organizing action of prenatally administered testosterone propionate on the tissues mediating mating behavior in the female guinea pig” by Charles H. Phoenix, an American researcher.

The study concluded that “INAH [part of the hypothalamus] is dimorphic with sexual orientation, at least in men, and suggests that sexual orientation has a biological substrate”.

Iran, China and Saudi Arabia have been the first countries to show interest in the new discovery.

«Xenoestrogen are a type of estrogen mimickers found in synthetic or natural chemical compounds. Synthetic xenoestrogens such as PCB’s, BPA and phthalates have been also been found to have estrogenic effects on living organisms and to disrupt the endocrine system» explains Dr. Yuri Krutchev, who took part in the experiment. «Injecting specific quantities of testosterone helps to

«Injecting specific quantities of testosterone helps to upset this artificial biological unbalance which occurs mostly in part because of environmental pollution and an excess of estrogen mimickers in our modern environment» he adds.

The new discovery has attracted much criticism from lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) organizations around the Globe, yet a few country leaders have outspokenly shown support and interest for the research. Iran, China, and Saudi Arabia have been the first countries to show interest in the new discovery.

American and European researchers have expressed much skepticism upon receiving the news.

13 Comments on "Russian Scientists Discover Cure to Homosexuality"

  1. Go Fuck Yourself | May 14, 2014 at 7:03 am | Reply

    So someone is ripping off Onion News and just making stupid articles? LOLOLOLOLOLOL. FUNNY AS FUCK…

  2. We have looked at the development of too much testosterone in a male body before. First and foremost, according to French scientists, having and elevated amount of testosterone may cause the males testes to shrink and the sac to shrivel. While it may be true, no tests have been conformed, or made public to, many scientists that the offset of testosterone may be a leading cause of homosexuality, great skepticism here, the offset of your natural chem levels may have a greater effect of the body. To like the same sex is not a wrong thing. There is no “Cure” for it. Your sexual stimulus is caused by the Oxycontin, and Endorphins being released by your body when you are near someone you think that is attractive. So, how are we to change the way that people think?

  3. This is obviously going above and beyond the need of modern medicine.

    It’s obvious that religion is a key factor and that having parents that don’t approve only makes it worse. You shouldn’t be teaching your kids what to do with their dick in a bedroom without your knowledge, you should be teaching them that life isn’t about praising a god 24/7, but instead you should teach them to go with them and follow their heart.

    Besides, if you keep telling them it’s bad based on sex, then who is the real gay here?

    • These are scientist trying to fix an abnormality.. has nothing to do with religion that’s really prejudice in every way.. read the damn article.

  4. thing is… why would you want to avoid being attracted to same sex partners?

    • Mick Dundee | May 14, 2014 at 4:32 pm |

      Are you retarded, or just one incredibly sick little sodomite?
      Now I’m pretty sure homosexuality is detrimental in relation to propagation of the species. Homosexuality should be attacked primarily because it undermines the healthy family unit, the foundation of civilization.
      Peace nigs, oh and I’m an atheist.

    • Are You Serious? | May 14, 2014 at 10:03 pm |

      Mick Dundee, are you serious?
      Let me tell you what is detrimental to the propagation of our species: mothers on drugs who give birth to deformed or addicted children, fathers who beat their wife and/or children to death, men and women who choose to let hate rule their heart and kill others because of their race, religion or sexual preference. All THOSE things properly and permanently undermine the “healthy family unit,” not some guy kissing another guy where you might have to see it and look away if it affects you.
      As for the “foundation of civilazation” tell me – if ancient Greeks and Egyptians had no problem with homosexuality, and their civilizations still exist, how is sexual orientation affecting the advancement of man through the ages?
      I submit that you, Mick, are a shamefully closed-minded person and would not be surprised to find your opinion expressed here is one you hold for anything that doesn’t fit with your choices and how you live your life.
      You’re full of hate, Mick, and that’s contagious. I hope you don’t bring children up to share your hateful rhetoric.

  5. I think that nature is wise and the homosexuality is a cure for overpopulation, besides that, I haven’t heard about an repentant homosexual. Actually it just affect the people who has not the “disease”, the people around them (haters and religious). The only moment when homosexuals suffers is when their own family doesn’t accept them.

    Answers to typical questions:
    No, I’m not gay.
    Yes, I’m atheist.
    No, I don’t care if you are religious or gay or anything, just be respectful and I’ll treat you as any person.
    Yes, I know, I don’t speak english very well (if I have a mistake in my writting).

    • It’s to prevent it in children before they reach adult hood, so they don’t develop the abnormality read the document please.

    • if your argument had any merit then why are the homosexual behavior in animals in a lot of mammals like dolphins and not in the species that are overpopulating such as ants, flys and other insects. so obviously not natures way to stop over population.

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